Everything’s Shit and We Don’t Have the Right Tools to Wipe

Why is 1-ply even an option in the first world? If we can’t *at the very least* guarantee everyone gets 2-ply, how can we call ourselves the vanguard of human civilization?

Using 1-ply is akin to wiping your ass with leaves. If we wanted to be wiping our asses with leaves we never would’ve left the trees. But we did because we wanted better.

Every toilet with a roll of 1-ply toilet paper is a step back into the goddamn trees.